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Posts Tagged ‘Getting Specific’

Recently we were blessed with the birth of our 3rd child. A beautiful daughter to throw into the mix with my two sons; bright, joyful and full of adventure. It is absolutely sweet to see the love they shower over the wee one. I think she is very lucky to have these two as her older brothers. Not to be coddled and kept from facing what challenges lay ahead for her. But to protect via their love, encouragement, support and unrelenting faith in her capabilities, of who she is and what gifts she brings to the world. They will undoubtedly drag her along on every adventure to be had, idea to be realized and story to be told. Or have to hang on to her coattails. Time will tell ;D.

When Ruhiyya was born, my sister-in-law Erika said to me “It’s interesting how with the birth of each child, there is a unique test that comes to us. I’ve thought about what it is those tests are meant to teach us. What is it we are meant to learn and develop, so we can give that to our child.” And then she asked me,  “What are you getting from her?”

I had to take a minute to think about it. Because I’m a very avid….. test chaser. Meaning, whenever tests come or I see a limitation in myself that needs some shaking up, I dive in head on to figure it out and discover what it is I’m meant to learn. Doing so requires a rather, abrasive process. Because we are going up against very uncomfortable, weak, dark, scared parts of ourselves, which our ego will do all it can to keep us from disturbing.

But I had never really thought about it in this way. I’ve always been a big believer that we learn so much from our children, from being parents. We grow in different ways that we otherwise wouldn’t have available to us. But I had never attributed a specific quality that I needed to develop, so I could then help my child develop it (you can’t give what you don’t already have) because that was what they were going to need as they carry on in this world. So I thought about it, starting first with my eldest.

Olaf

  Stand For What You Believe In

A couple days before he was due, Olee turnedbreach (head up). We tried to get him turned. Wouldn’t budge. In the end my wife had to have an emergency C-section. When he came out at almost 10 lbs and a very large head, everyone was shocked and then understand why he wouldn’t turn.

If you try to force him to do something, he will root down and not budge. If he is given the opportunity to come to it himself, having been able to work it out for himself, he is more than willing. He is extremely observant and bright. No small detail escapes his attention, or memory. And if your answer to his question does not meet a level of depth and reasoning to his liking, he will ask “Why?” until he is satisfied. Makes you question everything you do and why.

At the time of his birth, I was a first time father, pursuing a career that was not at all stable or secure, seen not as a serious undertaking, but standing by my strong sense that this was the path I was to follow, while at the same time committed to being an active part of my family’s life.

He was sitting across from me when it hit me like a flood rushing over me. He’s needed me to learn to stand for what I believe in, because that’s what he will most need to learn from me as he discovers his gifts and makes his way in this world, fulfilling whatever purpose he finds himself drawn to. And to stand by it, believing what intuition has guided him to it.

Will

 Pure Joyfulness

When Will came, he came in a rush. My wife definitely felt like this baby just needed to get out of the womb. When it was time, it was like “Let’s get this show on the road!” There was alot of uncertainty around whether he would come naturally, because Olee was a C-section. And our experience in the hospital after Olee was born was not the most Joyful experience (the dark cave we were put in, butting of heads with overbearing nurses, Juliet immobile, etc.). But Will was birthed successfully and if he could talk, I swear I would have heard him say “HELLO WORLD!!”. We both remember our time at the hospital after that as though we were staying at a Luxury resort.

And joyful he is. If people are feeling upset, he’s the first to smile. If people are feeling sad, he’s the first to try and get them to laugh. He is the first to wake in the morning, smile from ear to ear. He’s always giggling and laughing. He runs from one end of the house to the other constantly, as though on a wild romp. He loves to tackle and wrestle you. That kid’s fuel is joy. And he can run on it all day long.

At the time of his birth, I was feeling overworked, for little recompense, in a position I was finding uninspiring and suffocating. It was also in

the midst of my transition, as I prepared to launch my own business. Before I could do so, I needed to get out of the mindset I was finding myself struggling to stay out of.

I needed to connect with the joy of what I was pursuing. Funny enough, I later took a peek at the old blog and found the theme I had been writing about at the time (something had been ringing a bell). Turns out, it was Joy. ; )

He’s needed me to learn to find joy in all I do and to connect to it regularly, because that is what he will most need to learn from me as he discovers his gifts and makes his way in this world, fulfilling whatever purpose he finds himself drawn to. To stay connected to his fuel, that joy, as he does so.

Ruhiyya

 Serenity in the Hurricane

Ruhiyya’s birth was amazing. Juliet felt like she was in no rush whatsoever. She would come when she was ready. And when she did, from time the contractions started to the time she was born, 4 hrs. Yet the whole process was so calm, no rush, very smooth. The essence of serenity through one of the most intense experiences life has to offer. Family came to visit, everything as great. And then at the 6 hr mark, everything changed. Ruhiyya was having difficulty breathing. She was whisked away to emergency. She wasn’t absorbing oxygen. Could be a heart problem. Could be massive lung infection. Could any number of other major issues. And just like that, she had to get transferred to another hospital, to the Neo-natal Intensive Care Unit (NICU). Lucky for us, we have access to one of the best Children’s Hospitals in the world. We couldn’t have asked for a more amazing staff of doctors and nurses.

When we were able to get over to the other hospital and finally see her, she was on breathing support, with tubes coming out of every which direction. And yet she was just so calm. Now mind you she was on some drugs to knock her out. But within a day, she was off them and still, so calm. She was getting stuck with needles left right and center. Nothing. Not a squeak. It blew me away. After 5 days she was home with us. She is so amazing. So calm, so content. Such a blessing to have with us.

There was a strength about her. An ability to take everything that went on around her in stride. When Erika had asked me what I got from the whole thing, what I was supposed to learn, for Ruhiyya, it hit me immediately, very visually in my mind, with the words: Serenity in the Hurricane.

Because I have a real affinity for storms. As a kid, when it was a white-out and was hitting -50 C, that’s when I was heading out to play. When the rain is coming down heaviest, that’s when I feel drawn to go for a hike. I am drawn to the “hurricane”. Not in the “I need to be in a constant state of crisis” kind of way. That’s not my schtick. But I am drawn to the challenge. I am drawn to always living on the edge of the storm, to step in whenever the opportunity presents itself, and discover a new facet of myself. But admittedly, while most close to me would say I’m very calm, patient and level headed through times of personal challenge, that doesn’t necessarily mean I’m serene.

And what she needs me to learn is that serenity. True serenity in the face if the storm. Something closer to the way I feel when I’m actually out in one in nature. Because that is what she will most need to learn from me as she discovers her gifts and makes her way in this world, fulfilling whatever purpose she finds herself drawn to. Not running away or stuffing her anxiety as far down as she can. But actually feeling serene as she stares straight into the maelstrom, ready to face what the storms may bring.

To my 3 dearest gems, among the greatest blessings in my life, I strive with whatever strength I have, however humble an effort it may be, to develop these qualities.

For you…for me…..for you.

Daring to Evolve,
Dad.

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2011 is upon us and showing no sign of letting up whatsoever from the momentum of the year past. After a much needed week and a half off with the family over the holiday season (after an intense couple month preparation period and successful launch of my new training product, the Clubbell Mass Evolution), I came back to work. When I come back from having been off, it really is because I was off. I go completely offline. The computer shuts down, the phone gets turned off and I unplug. And having returned, the inbox is spilling over, there are a few loose ends to finish tying off from 2010 so I can really focus on the new year before me AND all the action required for everything that goes along with it. I imagine that is the same for many of us.

But I feel it is of the utmost importance to take a moment and reflect when reaching significant turning points, to fully draw what one can from the experience. And I just came across a very important reason for doing so.

Just before going offline, I was invited to be profiled for an article. I of course accepted, not knowing what the article was or which magazine it might be for. The request was coming from my Coach and Teammate, Scott Sonnon, and thus was fine with wherever it ws getting posted. I didn’t have much time to get into it, I had to answer the interview questions because I was going offline. The questions were very intelligent and I liked what was being asked. So I submitted and was done.

I am now back, just a couple days, and while attending to the final bits of last year and all the new bits of revving up for what is looking to be an even more incredible year than last, it’s been a little all over the place and from the outside could seem somewhat chaotic (heck, from the inside it looks chaotic ;)). Along with that, comes still being in the dark about some stuff. Then today, I see a few messages that end off with a “And congratulations on being chosen #1 trainer of the year!” Huh? Pardon? I had no idea what was being referred to. At first I almost thought it was just a really nice gesture by the individual. But I decided to do a little digging. And what do you know; I had been entered alongside 9 other trainers by RMAX International into a poll that would be voted on by the CST community for the Most Aspiring Trainer of the Year award. And as it turns out, I won.

And this is why it is so important to take a moment to take stock. Because the potential for missing this was there. And what I would have missed out on was, not finding out that I’d won, but having missed the opportunity to honour those in whose company I have been placed.

There is no denying that I stand upon broad wide shoulders, in whatever progress I have made in my growth and development, as a member of this CST community. I have always believed that no one truly does it on their own and that we learn, even if it be equivalent to that of a grain of sand and from a seemingly very negative interaction, something from everyone we come into contact with. And the fellow trainers on this list are no exception. This is what I have come to very much respect about the CST community. The caliber of individuals that it attracts. Not only does it attract these incredibly gifted, talented and innovative powerhouses, but those same trainers pour so much back into the community they’ve become a part of. Each of them to a man or woman, are imbued with a sense of service, for the betterment and progress of those around them.

My whole life has been motivated, inspired and driven by a strong sense of service to my fellow man, that we may collectively grow into the unquestionable capacity we have just waiting to be unlocked and tapped into. And to be surrounded and supported by a team of people that do the same is a blessing, gift and absolute honour.

This would be a very tough vote, as each of you brings something so unique in your expression and promotion of CST/TACFIT, that it’s difficult to differentiate the impact you have each had as individuals. Because it is precisely what you bring, as an integral piece of the whole, fulfilling a capacity that only you can bring to the table in the way that you all do, that plays such an important role in the effectiveness and impact we all have as a team on those around us. It’s no wonder it’s felt like an explosion of talent and growth amongst the CST trainers this year!

I know for myself, anything I have been able offer in service to those around me and in continuing to expand CST’s ever widening reach, ever deepening influence, it has been in large part due to the energy, selflessness, inspiration, support and encouragement of you all. I am honoured to be a part of this Team. To be a part of this collective that I truly believe will continue to be a significant part of trailblazing, shaping and facilitating growth for our family’s, community’s and our society at large.

Thank you Coach Sonnon for my inclusion amongst this amazing group of incredible individuals, in spotlighting the growth that is now going to continue blowing wide open by leaps and bounds.

Thank you to all, for your vote of confidence in my continued participation with this community and endeavour.

Boy….we thought 2010 was a huge year…..lookout 2011! 😀

Dare to Evolve,
Shane.

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Climbing a mountain requires fuel….

Dare to Evolve,
Shane.

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Just because you can see your path before you, doesn’t make it any easier….

Dare to Evolve,
Shane.

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Is getting to the top what counts?

Dare to Evolve,
Shane.

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Part 7 in the series “Life is Like Climbing a Mountain”.
Sometimes we get a little sidetracked. No problem. So long as we eventually find our way back, and don’t dismiss what we learned along the way to enhance our progress along our path.

Dare to Evolve,
Shane.

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Wrong mountain or merely the wrong hand placement?

Dare to Evolve,
Shane.

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